They hate the fact they were abandoned but believe that they can endure, and if they work hard enough, abandonment will never happen to them again. The codependent love addict fears abandonment as much as the narcissist.Įarly abandonment of a child places that kid into a very harsh environment, forcing them to endure and grow up rapidly. It is as if the narcissist and codependent love addict are fighting for the same thing. The narcissist is so good at their craft, that when their true colors emerge, they manipulate their codependent love addict partner to ensure they will not abandon them. Love addicts fall for narcissists and bond with them.

They appear confident, exciting and are a “match made in heaven”. Their ability to impress people is amazing. Narcissists are very charming in order to seduce people into liking them. They hold you to a high standard and exhibit disdain for what they consider weakness or vulnerability.

And they will never forget a past mistake. If you make an error they will be critical and unsympathetic. If you keep your eyes open, you can detect a narcissist’s need for control and self-centeredness. These narcissistic behaviors find a home in any gender, male or female and in any relationship, heterosexual, gay or bi-sexual. But really, a narcissist has to be in control so they are not abandoned, abused or hurt. In general, narcissists are incapable of maintaining a healthy relationship because they have to be in control at all times. They lack compassion for others, because everyone else is ‘less than’ or wrong. They are the ones that are perfect, and they should be catered to. These thoughts result in a distorted view of themselves. When these abused children are young, they decide that the world, and the people in it, are bad and they are the only ones that are good. Opposites attract and love addicts are vulnerable to charming people.” -Author, therapist and founder of Love Addicts Anonymous, Susan Peabody. “The most common toxic relationship is between the codependent love addict and the narcissist love addict.

Love addicts anonymous